Let me start this off by saying thank you to Abba! Thank you, Abba, for knowing what was best for me; thank you for tending to my needs, ignoring my wants, and changing my desires. Abba has a very particular way of developing us. It is not always the most comfortable thing in the world. And it can be far from it, but it cultivates us to be greater than our current selves for the next season.
Six months ago, I did not expect my life to take a turn for the worst, or at least what I believed to be the worst. But in the worst times, it was truly the best of times, or whatever Charles Dickens said! Over the past six months, Abba has been crushing me and still is. He has been leading me into the unknown, and to be frank, I am more than terrified. Most people do not admit that, and most likely never will. I have gotten my heart shattered, flunked out of grad school, and struggled with being a first-year teacher while facing depression. Pretty rocky, right? I would not eat, and I could not sleep. I did not want to sing, teach, pray, read my word, or do anything that required effort; I despised it.
Yet, in the same six months, I have bettered my relationship with God, birthed some of my gifts, and joined an amazing authentic worship team, Outpour. I could not and would not see all the things God was doing for me. That usually happens when we get stuck on the pain of being dragged from known to unknown territories. I hate change, especially when it is not my choice. I know many of you can agree and relate. But in this unknown space, Abba has added as he was subtracting many things from me. Scripture says, “I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit” (John 15:1-2, NKJV). In this unknown space, I have gained more than I have lost, because of the fruit I have cultivated, and in His infinite wisdom, He decided where I needed to grow.
Allow God to drag you into the unknown. Sometimes, we need a little bit of dragging into the unknown; we may get more than we bargained for and be pleasantly surprised. Allow Abba to increase and decrease you in the way that He sees fit. It is easier said than done because we think we know what is best for us, but we do not. Why not put it in the capable hands of the one who knew us before we were formed?