• Morgan Banks

How Are You Doing? No, Really?

Updated: Mar 29

In my conversations with mothers especially, we are all overwhelmed. We are overwhelmed with keeping up with the continual developments of COVID-19, the influx of emails from schools, businesses, and increased work-related communications. Many thought that their dream job was to work from home. Now it is their greatest nightmare. I have seen social media posts making light of dreams about Zoom calls gone bad, and how much we want to return to the office because we are working harder at home than we did in the office.

We are wearing more proverbial hats as women. We are mothers, spouses, cafeteria aids, janitors, employee(s), teachers aids, small business owners, neighbors, community members, constituents, etc. Some of us are not coming out of our homes. And others of us are braving the outdoors daily to make a difference for others.

Our homes were designed as our safe-havens, a place of rest where we can unwind. In my career, I have appreciated the unique privilege to preview thousands of homes. I have found that we all have a unique fingerprint in our homes. These same homes are now offices, classrooms, gyms, workshops, worship sanctuaries, and shelters from an invisible airborne virus (COVID-19), threatening our very lives. Our healthcare community is working round-the-clock shifts. Finding a way to support the world while juggling the new online school curriculum and meal prep in-between shifts. In summation, we are all surviving historic times and enormous stress.

It was not until I spoke to another parent did I fully swallow the magnitude of what I was feeling and experiencing. After my conversation and slight vent session, I felt human and heard, but more importantly, I did not feel alone. Once I addressed these feelings, I then had the space to consider what I needed and wanted. I was also able to identify what it is going to take for me to stay sane. I heard myself say in a conversation with a friend, “My battery is low.”

How are you recharging your battery this season? While I had an open space, I jotted down a few things that speak to me in what I need right now.

Pray several times a day

Get sunshine daily


Bathe daily

Get dressed like you are going to work

Watch your habits in this season


Keep a bedtime (I have not been doing so well with this one)

Take walks

Check on friends frequently and contribute when you can

Try new recipes

Reward goals achieved

Don’t expect perfection

Listen to your favorite music or create a playlist that inspires you


I would like to hear from you. How are you really doing? I have been making care calls to clients. Checking to see if there is any way that I can contribute. I’ve discovered that contributing gives me joy. I’ve heard you and still, I’m concerned that some of us are given an expected response and not really sharing how we are doing. We’ve grown so comfortable with just saying the canned responses.

“I am fine.”

“I am blessed.”'

“I can’t complain.”

You know the responses. Maybe you’ve responded this way when I asked, and I’m still asking, “How are you, really?” When you allow yourself to acknowledge where you are, then what you need can emerge. Freedom of expression and healing comes forth. I encourage you to really look and share honestly and openly.

Let’s start a conversation, post your comments below!

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